Listen to the Silence

Going to be  here at Charm City Play Space  on June 6th, for anyone who's going to be in the area and wants to meet!    My girl and I will be vending there, but we always love to meet new people in the scene, so come and say "Hi" if you're in the Baltimore area? I hear there's going to be a pretty good play party afterwards... K

Practice, practice, practice.   Pillows make great practice dummies – they leave behind one to two strokes worth of lines to show you if you’re getting a good clean stroke, and a good vertical line.   The time to make an “oopsie” isn’t on someone’s rear, it’s on someone’s pillow.  (That sounded dirty, didn’t it?) Know your rear ends.   And your thighs.   And your calves, and breasts, and soles of the feet.   Know where you can hit (those places), and where you should never hit (the spine line, base of the spine, kidneys, joints, hands, face, head, neck, shoulders, ankles, knees…just nowhere with bones, joints or major nerves, okay?).     Kneel, Lean and Rest.    Actually, kneeling, leaning, resting, bent over, on all fours, face down-ass-up…put the bottom in a position where they’re supported and where the body part you want is available for play.   Caning causes a sharp jump and sudden slack in the muscles – having a hot girl stand in the middle of a room while you do it may l

Knife Play – What should you pack (other than the knives)?   These days, everyone’s got their little kits and their little toy bags – and believe it or not, that’s a good thing.    You can pick up a toiletry or makeup box at any Walmart or Target for less than $10, and have everything you need for an entire fetish ready to go to town.    But while you’re packing the toys, don’t forget a few others things for your knife play… 1.      Rubbing Alcohol This should be a no brainer, but the after care of knife play should include cleaning and disinfecting both the skin and the knives – and if possible, a quick wipe should be worked into the “before” play as well.      Please be aware, rubbing alcohol is a low level disinfectant – it should NEVER take the place of good negotiation questions like “do you have any blood conditions I should know about?”   2.      Gauze Wrap and Paper Tape Because no matter how good you are – there are going to be accidents.   

Lately the news has been full of stories on high crime rates, how some cities are “defeating crime” ( no , they aren’t) with new initiatives, increasing efficiency with smaller police forces ( no , they aren’t ) and with new investigative units to crack down on “dirty cops”.   There are even a few about how police corruption is everywhere, and op-ed pieces that police should be replaced with other systems.   The media makes it look like officers live the life of Brian, with great salaries and tons of “extra” income sources.    Let’s review something, briefly.  The average starting salary for a Police Officer hovers around the high 38,000’s.   Some cities (ones desperate to hold onto officers, after putting theirs on blast for the last several years) offer as high as 43,000 or 44,000.   In most of these cities, the people who spit on officers (literally – ask any officer in a large city), make more than that spending half their 40 a week playing on Facebook.  My wife works with s

Here’s one of the most common things I hear from people about caning, summed up in one painful phrase:    “I broke like three canes on that bitch.  It was really a really hot scene.”  Breaking canes on your bitch does not make you uber-Sparkly-Domly-Dom.    All genitalia-to-cane-size comparison aside, it doesn’t make you an advanced or “serious” player either.    I really want to tattoo this into some people’s skulls…breaking canes in scene isn’t cool.   It’s stupid.   And ignorant.   And wasteful of natural resources like wood and rattan.  (Huhuhuhuhuh.    He said “wood”.) When you buy a care you look it up first, right?    Volvo’s live a long time, but they aren’t sporty.   Porsches are fast, but they suck gas like a whore when the rent’s due.   Mini-vans have great interior room, but they’re “conformist”.    Muscle cars look great and sound great – but you’ll have to do tons of maintenance.   Canes are tools.   So are paddles.   And spreader bars, and bondage fu

A.)  “You can’t say that about her choices, that’s gender-shaming!  Typical man!” B.)  “You’re threatened by her sexuality, you misogynist dick!   How dare you slut shame her!” C.)  “Saying that about my body is fat shaming, you sexist pig!” D.)   “Those jokes are insensitive to the trans community, you cissie!   That’s trans-shaming!” E.)  “You’re just uncomfortable with my testosterone laden behaviors.   That’s man-shaming you crazy chick!” …. Now, of those five, which have you never heard before?   If you don’t want me to fat shame, slut shame, goth shame, body shame, or trans-shame you – stop man-shaming me.    And if you REALLY wanted a world free of “-shaming”, you wouldn’t be using the same tactics yourself.   Since we BOTH know you aren’t going to stop anytime soon – don’t expect me to.   I’m a stereotypical male.   (Please note, I said stereotypical, not typical).   I smoke cigars.   I drink beer.   I believe in the triumph of common sense over the “awareness

A response to the Fetlife post “You are NOT the Police – The Hazards of investigating Consent or Abuse Allegations within the Scene” on FL here - https://fetlife.com/users/103811/posts/2179649 First – al-fucking right.   A-fucking-Men.  Finally.   Halle, paired with, lujah.   And so forth.  Every time I hear this whole blathering shite about “WE should investigate allegations of abuse/consent-violations/trigger triggering!”, I really just want to plotz.   Especially when it’s followed with this twaddle - “We should do self-policing and investigation of claims within our own scene!”   And if those particular British and Yiddish-isms aren’t enough for you – here’s some more.  The majority of the people yelling this “it must be investigated!” crap are great bloody minging twats.  Thank you.   Moving the rant on. .. Allow me to clarify – and if you can’t hear the sarcasm dripping down your screen, you really haven’t read enough of my rants in the past.  See, ther