Listen to the Silence

Someone emailed a while back and asked why I occasionally end my posts with "-30".  That's a (very sad) sign that I was writing freelance journalism back when the news was still something you received from a piece of paper.   -30 was a sub-note to the editor or publisher that the line was the end of the piece.   Another question - "Who is Samir Shabazz?"    Google is your friend, but to make it easy - he was the leader of the new Black Panther party, and helped organize the intimidation tactic of "presence" of Black Panther's at voting booths in various cities, back when Obama was running for election the first time around. And a question I've actually had more than once - "Have a biscuit?",  "See how that works, Victoria/Virginia?"      Those are evidence that my sarcasm matured and came "of age" while my I was an army brat living in HQ USAREUR, and living off of the BBC and SkyOne.   They're what we used

To the young, (mostly white) “we’re here, we’re kinky, get used to it!” crowd, and the “We built this shit!” crowds:   Please stop non-consensually butt-raping the word “tribe”.   That poor word has now officially been molested and sodomized worse than a Catholic choir boy.   It has been abused and mis-used to the point where it requires reconstructive genital and anal surgery.   Please allow it at least 12-18 months for healing, repeated reconstructive surgeries, and physical therapy.   Please.     Because, here’s the thing.   If you were raised in White American culture in the 20 th century, the odds are that you have no idea what “tribe” actually feels like and means.   The closest I’ve ever seen to it in White America is in poor southern trailer parks – where the sense of belonging and blood relations come pretty darned close.   I’ve seen glimmerings of it in Gay Leather culture – among the elders who have been around long enough that they’ve lived through twenty or thirty

UPDATE:   This was written almost a year ago this month, originally.   As of 12/20/2013, my girl, Cassandra Marie, has earned her collar.   A big part of that was reading this, and taking to heart…and surrendering her heart.    So congratulations, to my girl.  You belong to me, until the end.    --------------------------- I don’t know that I’ll publish this.   I may just clean it up, edit it, and leave it printed on the bed one day when I go into work.    But it’s something you need to read – and I wonder if it’s something other slaves need to read as well. So.   You’ve asked it.  You’ve asked over and over.   And over.   And over again.  ·          “Sir, when can I have my collar?” ·          “Can we pick out collars today, Sir?   *nudge-nudge*?”  ·          “Daddy, wheee-eeen are you going to collar me?” ·          “Sir… <name> was just collared…why haven’t I been? ” ·          “After the Wedding, then can I be collared?” ·         

During this holiday season, we’re all generally swamped with bills, shopping for presents, donations to charities, office parties, Polly-Annas, Secret Santas, decorating the house, minding the kids during holiday break…and the list goes on. I’ve personally blown through two full paychecks, for family presents, Secret Santas, Polly-Annas, house decorations, and gas to and from stores and stupid office parties.   I’d just like to take a second to ask that you remember the kink community during this holiday.   Not in a “lets have a Christmas play party!” way, or a “let’s do a seasonal canned food drive wearing leather!” kind of way.    Try to remember our community in the spirit of the holiday – giving and loving. There are a LOT of canned food drives already going on (and feel free to help them, they’re always in need).      There are also a lot of charities, and I particularly suggest supporting the Marine Corp’s “Toys for Tots”, in your vanilla life.   For us the holiday should b

Just realized I never put up these - a little list of books I send links to for newbies who ask me, or give to new people if I have them in stock and available) when I meet them. More to come, as I get them translated from straight links into doc'd HTML, and clean code. Good Books for Beginners - The Topping Book The Bottoming Book The Ultimate Guide to Kink BDSM Primer - Fetishes, Rituals and Protocols Good Bondage Books for Beginners - Two Knotty Boys Show you the Ropes Seductive Art of Japanese Bondage Power Exchange Books - Bondage  Shibari You Can Use  Good FemDom Books for Beginners - The Mistress Manual of Female Dominance The Sexually Dominant Woman Beginner's Guide The Art of Sensual Female Dominance At Her Feet - Guide to Empowering Your FemDom Relationship

Just a couple of quick ideas for christmas gifts - about two weeks late.  ^_^   Great Bondage Books http://www.amazon.com/Shibari-You-Can-Use-Japanese/dp/061514490X/ref=pd_sim_b_42 http://www.amazon.com/Two-Knotty-Boys-Showing-Ropes/dp/B0088UIFMY/ref=pd_sim_b_33 http://www.amazon.com/The-Seductive-Art-Japanese-Bondage/dp/1890159387/ref=pd_sim_b_39 http://www.amazon.com/Ropes-Bondage-Power-Exchange-Resource/dp/1935509020/ref=pd_sim_b_49 Great General BDSM Relationship Books http://www.amazon.com/Living-Masters-slaves-Their-Relationships/dp/1610981952/ref=pd_sim_b_6 http://www.amazon.com/Erotic-Slavehood-Miss-Abernathy-Omnibus/dp/1890159719/ref=pd_sim_b_41 http://www.amazon.com/Abernathys-Concise-Slave-Training-Manual/dp/0963976397/ref=pd_sim_b_64 http://www.amazon.com/The-Control-Book-Peter-Masters/dp/1442173866/ref=pd_sim_sbs_b_4 http://www.amazon.com/The-Masters-Manual-Handbook-Dominance/dp/1881943038/ref=pd_sim_b_3 http://www.amazon.com/Master-slave-R

Yep, I’m back.   And no “cool down” time on this one.   (You know it’s gonna be tart when I’m playing Marilyn Manson and KMFDM while I’m writing.) “My submission is a gift!”   Can we please stop this shit?   Please?    I mean come the fuck on…”my submission is a gift to be cherished”, “my Dominance is a gift to your womanliness”, “my sexuality is my offering to you”… Fucking stop it.   Seriously.   You sound like a fucking twat, and a prissy one at that.   Or, if you want the modern version…. “You sound like a cunt.”   And yes, I mean that to the men, too.   Dominance and submission are nouns.   They are states of being.   They can be used to indicate roles in a relationship.   They can identify markers, attitudes, philosophies and personalities.   They are ultimately expressions of psyche, or sexuality.   They are not – repeat NOT – fucking gifts. A gift?   That’s something you give someone, without expectation of return.  “Gift (noun): a thing given